Words

Many times, there are words in certain verses, phrases, quotes, sayings, speeches and sermons that shine an interesting light on our “walk with God,” as we may call it. However, opposite their intention, sometimes, one pushes another away with the very words that are being used to try to attract that person to the likes of our Heavenly Father and a life devoted to Him. These kinds of words have been cast into a box and turned either black or white, and one-dimensional, therefore, they can be misleading in the event of a discussion with someone while the “Christ-like life” is being spoken for in your favor, and this is when your very words start to work against you and your intentions. Hence, when we are representing God and His love for us with these words that have been held captive in the binds of a shallow and wrongly perceived definition, we then, consequently, mislead by painting a picture of Christ with vernacular that’s being looked at from the wrong angle. And because we are blinded of the fact that they were completely thrown off by what was said or the way it was said, we hold up our pretty canvas of “Christianity,” and wonder why we get a “Thanks. But no thanks.”

For example, FEAR, we often quickly and mindlessly recognize the word fear as an unpleasant emotion of terror, anxiety, and nervousness. So if one were to say to another, “wisdom starts with the fear of God,” one might, and rightfully so, greatly misinterpret this verse. Or to use a less specific example, being, the whole idea that we should fear God at all. One could wonder, “What kind of so called ‘loving’ God would want His own children to fear Him?” Because when you look at it while defining fear by the words used above, it seems as though God would prefer if His children would cower before Him, not humbly, but paralyzed with fright. And with that one could assume that He would like to force us into loving and serving, all driven by this sense of “fear” we’re supposed to be feeling and showing Him. Though this could go without saying, that kind of relationship between God and man would be frowned upon and completely avoided. Fortunately, our God is quite different than a god of that sort.

Another word that is often deeply misunderstood is OBEDIENCE. The act of obedience goes hand in hand with rules and restrictions. If there are not rules and restrictions, then there isn’t anything to obey or disobey; needless to say…we then have no need for obedience. But rules, restrictions, and limitations are another set of words that often have a negative connotation. They hold us back, they restrict us, and they leave us starving for more. They also challenge us, which is why so many “rebel” against requirements when they are laid down before us. They say “you can’t”…and we respond with, “Wanna bet? Watch me.” However, with God and obedience, once we begin to experience, not hear about, but actually encounter, first hand, His deep and unfathomable love for us, we realize that this, not instruction, but suggestion for obedience is strictly because His view of things is much greater than ours. And the love He has for us will try to guide us in the direction that would fulfill us deeper than we could even comprehend. And often in order to gain this deeper fulfillment and satisfaction, we have to take a road that looks like it would do the opposite of God’s intention, like it would strip us of our happiness that we do have and we don’t see a way that we’d find happiness again. So instead, we stay put, we stay safe and conclude that we’d rather be safe than sorry. For us, as educated human beings, we take 1+1 and it always equals 2. So when God tells us to take 1+1 and He will make it equal 10…our first reaction is disbelief, it's just not possible to take 1+1 and get anything but 2. We trust our own knowledge opposed to the Master of the Universe…the one who created knowledge itself. But that’s our human nature. And it will, at times, get the best of us. But we must learn that in obedience to Christ, it will call us, as He himself clearly preordained, that our obedience will not only cause struggle, pain and sometimes even great conflict, He does have the power to give us precisely the strength and endurance we lack to get us through to the other side. And the only thing we have to do while sailing through the ominous storm is trust him. When we discover God in the way that we see Him as a loving Father or a great protector and friend, we then gain a DESIRE to be obedient to Him because we have seen that His favor is on our behalf and we have experienced Him coming through for us, we’ve experienced the abundance of His power. Oswald Chambers said, “The Lord does not give me rules, He makes His standard very clear, and if my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation. If I hesitate, it is because I love someone else in competition with Him, viz., myself.”

Growing up, especially as teenagers, we have this attitude that is with us through every argument, decision and conversation we ever are a part of. The attitude is driven from a belief that we conjure up in our minds that we know every thing. As we mature, this fades (in some cases…I can not speak for everyone). We not only realize that we don’t have all the answers, we become more aware of the fact that our parents have a much greater knowledge for life than we thought. And usually only in retrospect we truly appreciate the love that our parents had for us and see that when they didn’t let us go to that certain party or whatever the case may have been, we now see that it wasn’t for any of the absurd, childish reasons we’d believed it to be when we were young. They were not out to ruin our happiness or spoil our teenage fun or to control our lives completely…it was entirely because they knew a little bit more about life and the way things are than we did. And for the same noble reasons that our parents wanted our obedience, God wants our obedience.

Over the past couple days I’ve been troubling myself with wondering what exactly I’ve been trying to say through all of this. And I urge you, take from it what you will. But I suppose I realized that we should be mindful about not only giving words, but also receiving them just as well. Remember always to seek further into words than just what is on the surface. I have a fervent aching in my bones for those who are missing out on the greatest of all truths because God can be so misunderstood. It’s like when someone sees a trailer for a movie and decides they don’t want to see it because the previews just didn’t strike their fancy enough to get them to their feet, or judging a book by its cover and never knowing the wonder that the pages hold deep inside.

So for those of us who’ve understood, it is our designated responsibility to make sure that every one has a chance to know the truth. No matter the lengths we must go to reveal it.

Come fire or flood, I will not lose heart

I just came back from visiting home for a month; while I was there I fell in love again with everything I had left behind when I moved. Which made it that much harder to leave again. At first, when I got home I noticed myself enjoying things, but shortly after I’d be disheartened because I knew it would all come to an end shortly. The reality lurked in the back of my mind that I wasn't there permanently and I'd have to leave it all behind once more when the beginning of the year came. And after a while that "one foot on the ground" mentality faded away because I seemed to be there for such a long time, trying to ignore the date each day, and it began to feel as though the time to leave would never come.

But it came, and I was heartbroken and unprepared. Even more so than the first time. I felt no peace. No comfort. I felt that part of my very being was ripped away from me the second I sat down at my first gate, realizing I was about to get on a series of airplanes that would take me to the complete opposite side of the world from everyone who makes me who I am. Needless to say, I did not want to go. But I KNEW that this is where I needed to be for these next two months and that if I let this temporary discomfort stop me from chasing after God's voice, I would be failing Him; and I refused to ignore His voice. So although my insides wanted to dig my heals into the ground and hold on tightly to the nearest railing or door that would stop my body from walking onto that plane, my hands and legs seemed to be perfectly sane, because I found my legs were walking me to my assigned seat and my hands buckling myself in.

Last night, was my second night here. And I've still been struggling. My emotions are intensified and I feel so much going on in my heart and in my head that I can't even begin sort it out to make sense of it all. I'm feeling extra sensitive and something someone said just seemed to hit me the wrong way and I broke down a little. I wondered what in the world I'm doing here and why would I put myself through something that seems to be so heartbreaking. Or even better, how could God possibly stand to give someone a calling that inflicts so much pain upon him or her? So looking for comfort I opened a book that Charlie's mom let me borrow called My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers. His hands were on mine as I flipped to the page He wanted me to see and God spoke to my heart just as I needed Him to.

The page talked about how God will set a vision in our hearts, and too often, before that vision can even be brought to reality, we lose patience and give up. And that occurs most while He is in the process of bending and breaking us to make us into exactly what we need to be in order to make that vision come alive. It says this:

"God gives us the vision, then He takes us down to the valley to batter us into the shape of the vision, and it is in the valley that so many of us faint and give way. Every vision will be made real if we will have the patience. Think of the enormous leisure of God! He is never in a hurry. We are always in a frantic hurry. In the light of the glory of the vision we go forth to do things, but the vision is not real in us yet; and God has to take us into the valley, and put us through fires and floods to batter us into shape, until we get to the place where he can trust us in the veritable reality. Ever since we had the vision God has been at work, getting us into shape of the ideal, and over and over again we escape from His hand and try to batter ourselves into our own shape."

So, come fire or flood, I will not lose heart. I have first hand seen the beauty of the promises of God. I would not be here if I didn't believe it would be worth it in the end.

I know His plans are magnificent, even more so than I find my own, even though at time’s that’s hard for me to swallow.